We have a 17.5 year old mixed breed dog that isn't doing well. She's completely incontinent and wears a diaper 24/7. She has degenerative myelopathy and is essentially non-ambulatory. She can stagger around IF we pick her up and support her. In the prime of her life, she weighed 50 lbs. Now, because of muscle wasting, she weighs 35 lbs. She barely interacts with the rest of the household, other than to whine/groan/wheeze etc... when she needs a diaper change or is thirsty or hungry. She's hard to feed because she's picky and easily distracted. She has "old lady" growths & abscesses, as well as sores and scrapes from her diapers. Her ribs and hips are showing.
I've been ready to say goodbye for several years now. My husband either doesn't see how frail she's become, or refuses to see it. He's taken on all of her care. He spends over an hour every night, flushing, cleaning and bandaging her abscesses, sores & growths. I think our regular vet has given up trying to reason with him, because he's just too. danged. stubborn. There's always a reason for her whining or her fussiness. He's building her a wheelchair, for Pete's sake!!! I've become angry, irritable and easily frustrated around the dog, and I hate myself for it. I've tried to show the same patience with her that he does. I've tried SO hard. But I can't do it. I just. Can't. Do it. And all this stress is affecting my health. I've tried talking to him many times about it, but he refuses to listen. He's always go a counter-argument.
Dixie and I used to be best friends. We used to do everything together. Not anymore. Now, we coexist. We share a house. If I wasn't worried about jeopardizing my son's education (he's in spec. ed. grade 1), I'd take my kids and go live with my mom. I've called mobile vets about doing a home euthanasia while my husband's out of the house, make it seem like she passed quietly in her sleep, but only 1 vet will do it without his consent, and she's a lot more expensive than all the others. The other vets won't do it without everyone's consent (and that's fine. I'm not faulting them for it at all.)
I just don't know what to do. I feel like I've been painted in a corner. Between the dog, the hubby, the kids and the business, I can't leave. I'm cornered...
I've been ready to say goodbye for several years now. My husband either doesn't see how frail she's become, or refuses to see it. He's taken on all of her care. He spends over an hour every night, flushing, cleaning and bandaging her abscesses, sores & growths. I think our regular vet has given up trying to reason with him, because he's just too. danged. stubborn. There's always a reason for her whining or her fussiness. He's building her a wheelchair, for Pete's sake!!! I've become angry, irritable and easily frustrated around the dog, and I hate myself for it. I've tried to show the same patience with her that he does. I've tried SO hard. But I can't do it. I just. Can't. Do it. And all this stress is affecting my health. I've tried talking to him many times about it, but he refuses to listen. He's always go a counter-argument.
Dixie and I used to be best friends. We used to do everything together. Not anymore. Now, we coexist. We share a house. If I wasn't worried about jeopardizing my son's education (he's in spec. ed. grade 1), I'd take my kids and go live with my mom. I've called mobile vets about doing a home euthanasia while my husband's out of the house, make it seem like she passed quietly in her sleep, but only 1 vet will do it without his consent, and she's a lot more expensive than all the others. The other vets won't do it without everyone's consent (and that's fine. I'm not faulting them for it at all.)
I just don't know what to do. I feel like I've been painted in a corner. Between the dog, the hubby, the kids and the business, I can't leave. I'm cornered...
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