Today was the straw that broke the camel's back.
My son (33 yr) still lives at home. Let me explain a little. Three years ago hubby and I moved to Idaho. Son and daughter stayed at the house to pay the mortage and just take over the house. Son had a good job and daughter was recovering from thyroid cancer and was also working. To make a long story shorter we ended up moving back to Utah and back into the house. We were struggling with finances so we all decided to stay on in the house and put our money together to cover the bills. It worked out for 2 years. Then son decided he didn't like his job and quit. Was going to get another one. Daughter had a new job and doing really well. Son got a crummy part time job from 3:00 am -8:00 am, then wastes rest of the day playing games on the computer. Saying he is looking for new job. He is trying to get on with State Troopers, or City Police. State Troopers is on a hiring freezer, hasn't heard anything from City Police. Now he has applied to go to flight school. Waiting for financing to come through.
What gets me is that he will not go out and get another job to work during the daytime hours. He drives our car, can't afford one for himself, not paying anything towards it. He is suppose to be paying off his bills with his little to nothing paycheck. So we haven't really asked him to pay for much. Felt he paid a lot when we were needing his help a few years ago.
Yesterday he went out to get lunch and maybe go to a movie. He comes home about an hour later and had decided not to go to movie. Rented a movie and a computer game.
This morning I happened to see the receipt. He had spent $38. for the the game! Let me explain a little here. For this pilot school that he wants to go to he needed $500 for the deposit. Daughter and us came up with the money because he doesn't have it. Now can you see why I was MAD? He had the money for this STUPID game but not for the deposit (Not that $38 would have been much towards it, but he could have put it towards a bill). If he would have just saved some money, instead of spending it like he doesn't have any responiblites I may not have blown up.
After I had finished grooming today I sat down and talked to him. I told him I was ready to kick him out the door and didn't care what happened to him. All he is doing is wasting his money when he should be saving it, paying his bills, paying us something. Told him he is freeloading off of us and we have had enough or it. He has to go and find another job while he is waiting for this flight school to decide if they will take him or not. If he doesn't do something he is out the door.
We are a family we are suppose to work together. We aren't suppose to just support one family member with him doing nothing in return.
I know we have made it toooooo easy for him. I can't kick him out if he doesn't have anywhere to go can I? He has no way to get anywhere, except walk and to take the bus.
I'm a softie, I know. It is our (hubby and me) fault that he is still living here. But I think I made some headway with him today. He did go and buy a few groceries, which he hasn't done in 3 months.
Sorry this is so long. Thanks for letting me vent.
This morning I blew up.
My son (33 yr) still lives at home. Let me explain a little. Three years ago hubby and I moved to Idaho. Son and daughter stayed at the house to pay the mortage and just take over the house. Son had a good job and daughter was recovering from thyroid cancer and was also working. To make a long story shorter we ended up moving back to Utah and back into the house. We were struggling with finances so we all decided to stay on in the house and put our money together to cover the bills. It worked out for 2 years. Then son decided he didn't like his job and quit. Was going to get another one. Daughter had a new job and doing really well. Son got a crummy part time job from 3:00 am -8:00 am, then wastes rest of the day playing games on the computer. Saying he is looking for new job. He is trying to get on with State Troopers, or City Police. State Troopers is on a hiring freezer, hasn't heard anything from City Police. Now he has applied to go to flight school. Waiting for financing to come through.
What gets me is that he will not go out and get another job to work during the daytime hours. He drives our car, can't afford one for himself, not paying anything towards it. He is suppose to be paying off his bills with his little to nothing paycheck. So we haven't really asked him to pay for much. Felt he paid a lot when we were needing his help a few years ago.
Yesterday he went out to get lunch and maybe go to a movie. He comes home about an hour later and had decided not to go to movie. Rented a movie and a computer game.
This morning I happened to see the receipt. He had spent $38. for the the game! Let me explain a little here. For this pilot school that he wants to go to he needed $500 for the deposit. Daughter and us came up with the money because he doesn't have it. Now can you see why I was MAD? He had the money for this STUPID game but not for the deposit (Not that $38 would have been much towards it, but he could have put it towards a bill). If he would have just saved some money, instead of spending it like he doesn't have any responiblites I may not have blown up.
After I had finished grooming today I sat down and talked to him. I told him I was ready to kick him out the door and didn't care what happened to him. All he is doing is wasting his money when he should be saving it, paying his bills, paying us something. Told him he is freeloading off of us and we have had enough or it. He has to go and find another job while he is waiting for this flight school to decide if they will take him or not. If he doesn't do something he is out the door.
We are a family we are suppose to work together. We aren't suppose to just support one family member with him doing nothing in return.
I know we have made it toooooo easy for him. I can't kick him out if he doesn't have anywhere to go can I? He has no way to get anywhere, except walk and to take the bus.
I'm a softie, I know. It is our (hubby and me) fault that he is still living here. But I think I made some headway with him today. He did go and buy a few groceries, which he hasn't done in 3 months.
Sorry this is so long. Thanks for letting me vent.
This morning I blew up.
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