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Hurtful comments from "big dog" people...LONG

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  • Hurtful comments from "big dog" people...LONG

    I have thought about posting this question for a long time, but I've finally had enough and decided NOW would be a good time to ask.

    HOW do you deal with people who don't like little dogs? I mean, I couldn't care less, so WHY are they bothering to tell me? My dogs were sitting right there when they made the comments, so why would they do that? It's clear that "I" like little dogs, so why the rudeness? And the straw that broke the camels back was just recently, and my dogs were not even around.

    My response (particularly to co-workers at the animal hospital), is "I like ALL dogs." and it's true. Big or small, I love them all. They all have 4 legs and a tail, and they are all beautiful animals, created by God. Because one is smaller than another, suddenly they are less valuable?

    Examples:

    Co-workers who see me potty walking a small dog I've just groomed, and I say, "Isn't she cute?" "No, I don't like small dogs." I think their issue is because the smaller dogs scream when they need to take blood, etc. HELLO, when you are over 25 X's the dog's size, holding its head up and pulling its leg out of natural position, I would scream too!

    Then there was the day we went to the county fair. We stopped at Del Taco on the way. The dogs were safely locked in the car on a cool day, we sat next to the window, clear view of the dogs, and alarm on in the car (for those of you who want to rip on me for leaving them in there, lol), and a guy working there sees me looking at something, he asks what I'm checking on, I said 'My dogs,' to which he replied he loves dogs. Then he saw them. "Oh, I don't like little dogs. Especially poodles." Well, good for you. WHY are you telling ME this? Same response though, "I love ALL dogs."

    SAME DAY, we are at the fair, and the lemonade stand guy sees my dogs and says the same thing, but says he'd take the yorkie but not the poodle. I felt like telling him he could take a flyin' leap off a tall bridge, but I just looked like I was confused (Because I was. I was confused as to WHY on earth would you tell me that, dude?).

    There have been other comments but the most recent comment came a few days ago at my sister in law's house. Her best friend (a lady in her 50's) was there. OUT OF THE BLUE I hear her say, "I don't like little dogs." I said, "hey, I heard that!" in a joking manner. She then said, "They always jump on you, they want to sit on your lap, etc..." I once again said, "I love all dogs," but what I would love to have said is, "Hmmm, I don't like BIG dogs for the same reason---they always jump on me, knock me over, get their muddy paws on me---especially DOODLES!" (they have one). Truthfully speaking, big dogs DO always jump on me, knock me over, muddy my clothes, but I STILL love them. Oh, did I forget to mention the occasional druel, and all the shedding, knocking things over with their tails? Oh, but this lady keeps her dogs outside, they are free, lots of land, happy dogs, but mostly useless otherwise.

    Anyway, it hurt my feelings. Dogs are DOGS, no matter how tall or thick they are. My yorkie doesn't take **** from anybody, and he's only 5 lbs. My poodle thinks he can kick another dog's butt, and I don't tell him any differently, he's a riot. Spinning in 360's and barking at the "uninvited guest." (Of course there is a fence between them, lol).

    Please people, give me a good come back that will make them pause. I love ALL dogs, they are all useful for something. "Good for them" if they don't like little dogs, but do I give a flyin' poo? NOPE. So maybe I should tell them that. Naww...I want something that will cut to the core a little deeper, and a little more painful, bwahahaha...evil laugh.

    Tammy in Utah
    Last edited by SpikeyTheYorkie; 11-27-09, 07:14 AM.
    Groomers Helper Affiliate

  • #2
    I believe that our preference for dogs, in a way, is determined by our personalities. Kind of like our preference for cars. Most people, I believe, choose cars in an attempt to reflect their personalities. Same with dogs.

    So when people make a remark about their preference for dogs they are really exposing to you a bit about their personalities. And if they don't like YOUR choice of dogs we can easily misinterpret that as them telling us that they don't like OUR personalities. But that's not the case at all. They are just saying that your choice of dog doesn't fit THEM. Nothing more.

    Me? I do prefer to be around bigger dogs. Though I really do like them all. I'm just not the cute and cuddly type. But that doesn't mean that I don't like my wife to be cute and cuddly (and she prefers little dogs).

    So they are not attacking your personality, just exposing theirs.

    Now I have a problem with people don't like dogs at all. These are people you just can't trust.

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    • #3
      I would say don't take it personally. I have lots of people say similar things about my large dogs. I don't care. I don't care for little dogs either (in my home- I like my client's dogs just fine). I've said "I'm not a little dog person" when the situation warranted it, and it's the truth. More people like small dogs than large dogs. Just look at any shelter, the small dogs get adopted or pulled before the larger dogs.

      My issue is more with the average and often ridiculous small breed owner. The constant babying, enabling and not holding the dog to same standards as a much larger breed. All dogs need training and my god, if they have legs they can walk-stroller not necessary. Not everyone, I realize, but there is a trend. I've fostered many a toy breed, no babying, no constant carrying- big or small, same rules apply.

      Do you expect people to lie in the interest of being polite? I mean you asked someone directly if they thought the dog was cute. Apparently, they were being honest, lol.

      Do you know how may snarky comments I get about owning Coonhounds as pets? Like they're uncivilized and unfit to be companions. Honestly, if you had a Bloodhound or a Great Dane, you'd hear more ****. -"You keep that thing in the house?!"

      Don't sweat it. Some people are particular and some of those people are also rude.
      That Tenacious Terrier!
      www.thattenaciousterrier.com
      https://www.facebook.com/ThatTenaciousTerrier

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      • #4
        I think part of the reason is that small dogs arent always bred with the best temperaments in mind. If my Dobes acted like a lot of small dogs, they would be euthanized for temperament issues simply because of the size factor. Plus a lot of people drees up little dogs, spoil them and treat them like humans which only increases the temperament issues and make people roll their eyes.

        But I agree, saying those things to an owner of a small dog is rude for sure.

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        • #5
          You can always tell them well im sure they dont like you either..

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          • #6
            wow

            I hope you feel better now! I think you need a simple response, one liner for these people...like "really, I hate eggs", laugh and walk away. How bout this one "ohh, I like to chew aluminum foil". It's not a big dog / little dog thing... it's just people sharing un solicited advice, like terrets.

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            • #7
              My response would be " I hate stupid people." As far as your coworker goes if she hates little dogs maybe she needs a different profession because I wouldn't want her touching one of my little dogs. I am with you I do not understand why everyone thinks we give a crud about they think about anything much less dogs that don't belong to them. It's their loss for being ignorant because all dogs are wonderful. I love them all.

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              • #8
                well I'm just evil all the time lol..I am a big dog person myself but I do love so many little dogs too heck I just love animals all together.But anywho for those snide comments type of people I normally ignore them myself but for those moments I just can't help myself (yeh it happens now and then hehe).something might fly out of my mouth like.[ they say]

                [I don't like little dogs ] its ok I'm sure they like you even less and I can relate.

                [I have no use for little dogs] yes I'm sure its hard to have something so small around that has a bigger brain than some people

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                • #9
                  Well garsh, Spikey, I'm not too witty, but maybe just tell them how you feel. (Of course if someone comes up with something awesome, feel free to toss this advice LOL!) What if you gave them a really sad face and said, "That is my baby and that hurts my feelings. How would you feel if someone said that about YOUR dog?" ... or you could be mean and say, "Geez your kid is really ugly! I only like the cute ones : )"

                  This reminds me of something funny...if I may interject: One day I was walking my vet boss' old lab on my lunch break. I didn't have a dog and LOVED Mr. Wilcox and so I walked him all the time just for fun. We were going down the sidewalk and as we passed a very elderly man, who seemed pretty happy just to be upright, says to me he says, " big, fat dog, eh? " My immediate response was (because he was pretty fat for a VET's dog) " He ISN'T MY DOG. I'm just walking him! " I was so embarrassed for some reason and I defended myself. Then I had a good laugh at thinking about how silly I must have sounded...

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by SpikeyTheYorkie View Post
                    Please people, give me a good come back that will make them pause. I love ALL dogs, they are all useful for something. "Good for them" if they don't like little dogs, but do I give a flyin' poo? NOPE. So maybe I should tell them that. Naww...I want something that will cut to the core a little deeper, and a little more painful, bwahahaha...evil laugh.

                    Tammy in Utah
                    >>>>

                    Most of my comebacks would be far too mean for you to use. I'd make up some comment on 'sizeism', and ask them how they felt about people of other races.

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                    • #11
                      I am looking forward to hearing some good comebacks too. I am sick of people telling me my dog isn't a dog - it's an "overly hairy guinea pig".

                      I have a friend who used to live in South Africa where there is a lot of crime!! They call little dogs 'porch dogs' because little dogs would not dare wander off the property or they could become some lions snack. So I asked him, why would people buy such little dogs that could become some large animals meal? If there is a predator in the house or on the property a little dog is going to yap yap yap yap yap and doesn't shut up till it gets your attention. A big dog (who is kept out side in the simmering heat will just give a few low uff uff. So there the little dogs are their security alarm's and they might also have a bigger dog just for damage control - but if it's too hot the dog might not move away from the shaded tree to help you out.

                      I'm just glad I don't live in an area where I have to worry about having security dogs.
                      I'm really just a little dog in a big dog's body (I really should cut down on those milk bones).

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                      • #12
                        People in general are just thoughtless. Many of them just don't realize that there are those of us that see our dogs as more than "just" dogs, no matter WHAT their size or looks or slobber problems. I don't in any way, shape or form see or treat my dogs as people, but they are still VERY valued family members.

                        Years ago I had a Peek named Ursula. She wasn't the prettiest. In fact she had a "so ugly she's cute" kind of face. I loved her dearly. She was the sassiest, funniest, take no **** off the big dogs girl. She had a personality that bulged from her tiny body. Like you I was constantly stunned at the rude comments aimed at her. Made no sense what-so-ever that people think it is okay to say mean things about my dog in front of me. Would they say ugly things about my kids in front of me????

                        Wait, yeah they would. A few yrs ago at church the visiting mother of a member was gushing over me having the "nicest looking girls" totally ignoring my son who was also standing right there. She then said in a hushed voice, while cutting her eyes at Tyler (who could hear and see her) that girls were just "better". If we weren't in a place of worship..............!!!!!

                        Anyway maybe you can get a bumper sticker that says My Little dog can Kick your Honor Role Student's Butt.......lol.......that will give them something else to comment on!

                        BTW I never get the same kind of rudeness about my big dogs usually just people questioning me if I ever worry about them being w/the kids......lol......ummmm, NO!
                        SheilaB from SC

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                        • #13
                          Be a duck and let the water roll off...

                          I own dogs from 143lbs to 7lbs and I love them all... Well I mean there are a few select breeds of which few have impressed me, but those come in various sizes! I get mixed comments usually depending on who I have with me. If I'm walking my Great Dane and Rottie/catahoula cross I get the OMG GET THOSE BIG DOGS AWAY FROM ME! If I'm holding my pink chinese crested I get everything from the 'I don't like small dogs', 'WHY would you DO that do a DOG???' and the "OMG WHY DID YOU SHAVE HIM?!!" comments. Then I get the most hurtful comment of all.... "That dog is so freakin ugly... I don't see why anyone would want something so gross" in reference the the hairless breed. THAT is what makes me cringe.

                          For most people I just simply ignore them... I look at is as MY choice to bring my animals in public, and whatever comments are made are comments I have no control over. If you don't like my dog? Ok, don't look at it... Or ignore the person completely! What would you say to a racist remark in public? I for one would politely excuse myself from the situation.

                          If you come into my HOME or my SALON and insult me, USUALLY I will lecture a little bit... "color on a dog is no different than regular shampoo, and the attention they receive afterwards is more than a non colored dog will ever enjoy" "I don't SHAVE him, that's the breed's natural style, would you like to touch his skin? See there is nothing wrong with him!" "my big dogs are so gentle... why don't you give him a treat and touch his back, I promise there will be no harm..." But... for the ugly comment I have less patients. Depending on how it was phrased I general look hurt and say that this dog is my child and he means the world to me. How would you feel if your child looked different or had a defect and someone came into your home and called them ugly? I made one lady give him a treat and apologize to HIM.

                          You could also look them dead in the eye and explain bluntly, DUDE, you just insulted my kid. That was RUDE of you.. and for that matter you could stand to loose a few lbs as your blocking out my sun. Also your breath is atrocious... here's a greenie, you need it more than my dog!

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                          • #14
                            Everyone is entitled to an opinion and the "others" are as entitled to theirs as you are to yours.

                            I am not particularly fond of children, could never force myself to watch "The Sound of Music" from start to finish, hate beer and have zero interest in major league baseball. Others love and are passionately devoted to all of the above.

                            So be it.

                            I have small dogs myself. When I meet someone who considers them fish bait, I just laugh and say if a dog isn't small enough to easily stuff under my arm and walk around with, it is too large for me personally.

                            And I leave it at that. I don't get ticked just because others hold a different viewpoint on the matter.

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                            • #15
                              I feel your pain...

                              but I have the opposite problem. I have big dogs (3 standard poodles all over 50lbs and 2 giant schnauzers 85 and 103 lbs).

                              When a person says, "I don't like big dogs", especially in front of mine, I say, "Shhhh! Don't tell them they're big - they think they are 5 lb shih tzus!!!" The opposite could be said of small ones! "Shhhh! He thinks he's a pit bull! Don't ruin his day!!!'

                              Usually, this makes the clients laugh and there are no hard feelings. The only time I'm tempted to be mean is when a client owns a dog that I really don't like. It's hard to hold my tongue. Kill 'em with kindness!

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